Saturday, January 10, 2009

Mystery Wrapped in a Pup Tent

While sitting in the Frankfurt departure lounge this morning, en route home via Detroit, I noticed a half dozen women in Burqa Brand Pup Tents. Considering southeast Michigan is home to one of the largest Muslim communities outside the Islamic crescent, that wasn't particularly surprising.

However, on accidental inspection, this was: high heels on every one of them, which were barely visible with each step.

I have heard the empathy promoting exhortation to metaphorically walk a mile in someone else's shoes. Unfortunately, I would suffer a dentition destroying impact with the floor after only one step in the podiatric teeter-totters these paragons of Islamic virtue were wearing.

Given that limitation, I will defer to self-acknowledged experts, aka women I have known, that high heels are neither about mobility nor comfort; rather, their point is something else altogether.

That something else, sufficiently obvious to require no further diagramming, would seem to be rendered wholly beside the point while almost, but not quite absolutely entirely, under the burqulan cloaking device.

Leaving only the mobility and comfort advantages of high heels.

I had long since learned that women rate a 10 on the inscrutability meter.

Nope, better make that an 11.

Speaking of inscrutable -- I am completely baffled by the Islamic insistence upon depriving the world of feminine pulchritude. Just like a sunset over the Grand Tetons, the female form is a gift from nature. Did Allah really go to all that bother just to hide the results under a tent?

13 Comments:

Blogger Duck said...

I think it has something to do with flexing the gluteal and calf muscles, also causing an arch in the back that accentuates the curve of the buttocks.

Or something like that.

January 10, 2009 3:21 PM  
Blogger erp said...

Skipper, best leave it at that. High heels aren't uncomfortable. I've worn them all my life and the only part of my anatomy that isn't in constant pain are my feet. Also the pain in my other body parts (de-cartilaged knees, scoliosis & spinal stenosis, shoulder bursitis, chronic sinusitis, etc. aren't from the stress of the high heels.

The girls at the airport wearing pup tents and high heels? Now that's inscrutable.

January 10, 2009 3:42 PM  
Blogger Hey Skipper said...

I think it has something to do with flexing the gluteal and calf muscles, also causing an arch in the back that accentuates the curve of the buttocks.

Well, yes, of course.

But under the Burqa Brand Pup Tent? That's more pointless than putting on tanning lotion at night.


erp:

High heels aren't uncomfortable.

Well, I've heard otherwise. However, I guess that proves your footage may vary.

----

BTW -- I'm particularly proud of a play on words in the original post.

Or, at least I was, until no one noticed.

January 10, 2009 4:14 PM  
Blogger Susan's Husband said...

High heels also accentuate the sway of the hips, which might well be visible under a burqa.

January 10, 2009 5:34 PM  
Blogger Hey Skipper said...

Not these Burqas.

Well, on second thought, that might be true, but not in a way that I would readily have noticed if not for the Burqulan cloaking device.

However -- that might well be true. Which is ironic, isn't it?

Every BBPT woman I saw walking had serious stilettos on, which means they were still intent on getting the message out (as it were) despite the pup tent to the contrary.

January 10, 2009 5:58 PM  
Blogger Harry Eagar said...

I've little doubt that under the burqas, the women were dressed in high fashion, lipsticked and rouged and wearing expensive coiffures.

For display to their man (or one-fourth) within the privacy of the family abode when they get to Dearborn.

There's a good chapter about this in 'Nine Parts of Desire: The Hidden World of Islamic Women' by Geraldine Brooks (otherwise, a pretty silly book).

January 11, 2009 11:05 AM  
Blogger Hey Skipper said...

Yes, but.

In an airport a long way from Dearborn, heels would fit easily in a bag, and they could be wearing trainers instead.

----

Perhaps my play on words isn't as funny as I thought it was. Or, fewer people know what some commonly accepted words really mean.

January 11, 2009 12:56 PM  
Blogger erp said...

Skipper I read your post a couple of times and can't find your pun. Please reveal it.

BTW - referring to sneakers as trainers? You've been out of the country too long.

January 11, 2009 7:58 PM  
Blogger Hey Skipper said...

Look up the etymology of "Grand Tetons"

----

Perhaps my using "trainers" is more a reflection of how much I pay attention to footwear as anything else.

January 12, 2009 8:37 AM  
Blogger Harry Eagar said...

I got it without the hint.

January 12, 2009 9:46 AM  
Blogger erp said...

Imagine my chagrin ...

January 12, 2009 11:17 AM  
Blogger Ali said...

The Quran enjoins worshippers to dress modestly since it was common practice back then for women to walk around topless. The veil was adopted from the Christian upper classes of Damascus, the burka was popular with the really strict Muslims. It's never been widely adopted in the Muslim world.

It's not uncommon here to see religious Muslim females wear tight jeans, heels and full-sleeved tops while maintaining a headscarf. Call it multiculturalism.

January 12, 2009 1:29 PM  
Blogger Hey Skipper said...

I got it without the hint.

Which means I am less funny than I thought.

----

The amazing part, for anyone who has seen the mountain range, is how Grand Tetons would occur to anyone.

We were there a year and a half ago. One of the park signs explained what Grand Tetons actually meant.

After reading it, My son, then 13, said "That's really random."

January 12, 2009 3:02 PM  

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